Gifts Not to Give Women
95Avoid Insulting Gifts or Impractical Gifts for Women
When you are giving a gift, you want to get them something they will love - something that shows them how much they mean to you. Gift shopping should not be a chore to check off your "to do" list. With just a bit of planning ahead and considering interests, you can impress the special woman in your life with a meaningful, memorable gift.
Yet, so many people end up buying insulting gifts or impractical gifts for women. Is it because they are clueless? Because the best gifts are too expensive? Or maybe its because they just can't think of anything else to buy?
Sometimes, all of the above!
While each woman's individual tastes differ, there is a fairly short list of gifts not to give women (unless she specifically asks for one of these items).
Avoid these present buying mistakes, and you are half-way there!
Small Kitchen Appliances
Like it or not, a blender or mixer often carries the implication that you'd like your gift recipient to spend more time in the kitchen (usually preparing meals for you!). Even if it is the hottest, most amazing new invention on the planet, a woman is not going to appreciate it as a gift.
Same goes for knives. Dangerous to give an irritated woman who might have been expecting a smaller box.
Gifts like these send an unintended message that simply isn't heartwarming. Remember the scene in the Father of the Bride when Annie's fiance gives her a blender? She nearly called off the entire wedding!
Cleaning Products or Supplies
Believe it or not, but my father once gave my mother a vacuum for Christmas. What may be even more surprising is that they are still married. But she NEVER lets him forget that big gift mistake.
Just as with kitchen appliances, anything that purportedly makes cleaning house or laundry easier is not a proper item for a gift. Its the kind of thing that you bring home from the hardware store on any date other than a birthday, Christmas or anniversary - just because. Even then, tread carefully.
I suggest the following script (spoken brightly and with excitement): "I know how much you hate vacuuming/dusting/washing the windows. I thought I could use this new [fill in the blank] to help more often."
Then, you must actually proceed to do so. Trust me, its one of the easiest ways to turn women on.
Gifts Not to Give Women
Lotions, Bath Oils and Candles
Lotions, bath oils and candles are the classic cop-out gift. Most of them are cheap and heavy with fragrance. To me, they say, "I couldn't think of anything else to buy you."
If a woman really wants these items, she will get them for herself. Chances are, she already has a shelf full of lotions, etc. received as hostess gifts from her girlfriends. The other pitfall with buying candles, bath oils and the like is that the fragrance will not be one that she enjoys. For example, my mother-in-law is not a fan of lavender, although I really enjoy it (this is not a hint for gifts for me, by the way....)
Pass up the lotions, bath oils and candles. Don't give her another item to eventually re-gift!
More Bad Gift Ideas (for Women and Men)
Cheap Perfume
If you are purchasing fragrance for a woman in a drug store or discount retailer, don't bother! Cheap perfume is even worse than lotions and bath oils, in my opinion. There is really no use for it, and you can't even properly re-gift cheap perfume.
To play it safe, you don't want to buy perfume online either, unless you are picking up a new bottle of a fragrance she already has and enjoys.
Keep in mind that fragrances worth buying as gifts usually cost at least $50 for a few ounces. To avoid getting an unwanted gift for the special woman in your life, take her shopping and test out a few fragrances in the perfume department together. Then, when she opens her gift, she'll be pleasantly surprised that you remember the ones she liked best!
Women Know how to Spot Fake Diamonds
Get the Real Deal for Handbags and Always Check an Ebay Seller's Feedback!
|
|
NWT & GIFT RECEIPT 70455 COACH EMBOSSED GRAMERCY LEATHER MESSENGER TOTE BAG
Current Bid: $249.99
|
|
|
NWT AUTHENTIC COACH SOHO SIGNATURE NORTH SOUTH TOTE F17401 RETAIL$348
Current Bid: $129.00
|
|
|
COACH # 5
Current Bid: $19.99
|
|
|
NWT COACH FLOWER APPLIQUE SIGNATURE WRISTLET F47214 MSRP $78 AUTHENTIC
Current Bid: $35.00
|
|
|
NWT NEW COACH 17890 POPPY TOTE BAG BLACK GOLD LUREX SIGNATURE, NO OUTLET $228
Current Bid: $139.77
|
|
|
COACH F44160 MULTICOLORED TARTAN PLAID HANDBAG NEW WITH TAGS
Current Bid: $65.00
|
Fake Jewelry or knock-off designer handbags
Fake jewelry is another gift not to give women. Do not - under any circumstances - try to pass off cubic zirconia as diamonds, or silver-plated jewelry as sterling silver. Like the old adage, if it looks too good to be true, then it probably isn't real.
If the special woman in your life wants fine jewelry, then she must know she is worth it for you to make the appropriate investment. Trying to fool her is not only insulting, but the truth will almost certainly come out eventually. Fake, cheap jewelry may turn her ears or fingers green. Cubic zirconia will lose its sparkle and luster over time, ending up looking like small chunks of glass.
Trying to pass off "designer-inspired" handbags as the real deal is just as insulting. If you are not going to purchase the Coach or Burberry bag she wants, don't waste your money or time on a knock-off. Women know what to look for and will inevitably spot a fake. Even worse is if her friends tell her its fake before she discovers it for herself!
Weight Loss Programs or Gym Memberships
Like it or not, one of the worst gifts to give women is membership in a gym or weight loss program. It is the opposite of the message she wants to hear, that she is beautiful no matter her size or shape.
She may drop hints all the time that she wants to lose weight or tone up. But, like many of the gifts not to give women in this hub, this is something she will have to invest in herself.... when she is ready! The same thing goes for home exercise equipment. Unless she has specifically asked for weights or a treadmill, don't risk insulting her with these gifts.
Slightly less insulting is a joint membership to a gym (but never a weight loss program) with the comment that YOU want to get in shape and that you hoped she could come along to inspire you. Just make sure that this statement is: (1) true, and (2) believable!
Gift Cards
My mom always taught us that its rude to tell someone what you spent on their gift. We always carefully remove price tags and avoid references to an expensive shopping trip, or the great bargain we were able to score.
That was 30 years ago, though. Today, gift cards are prevalent and can be purchased for just about any service, item or experience. However, a commercial gift card specifically shows exactly how much money you spent on the recipient. The potential for insulting a woman is high. Plus, it also sends the message that you simply could not come up with anything to purchase which shows a lack of interest or laziness on your part.
If you want to give a gift that cannot be wrapped or must be purchased in the future, why not create your own gift certificate - without any reference to price, etc. For example, a night at her favorite restaurant on New Year's Eve, or a trip to the wine country together.
Make sure that the gift is about her tastes and not yours, however. A certificate to the Monster Truck Rally, or chainsaw carving convention likely would be additional gifts not to give women!
Have Something to Say?
Did you enjoy this article? If so, please leave me a comment below and tell me what you liked best.
If you are a woman, be sure to share the worst gift you ever received!
For more information about the author, Stephhicks68, please visit my profile page here on HubPages.
Want to join in the fun and publish here too? Why not sign up here? Its FREE!
vote upvote downshareprintflag
- Useful (14)
- Funny (14)
- Awesome (6)
- Beautiful (2)
- Interesting (9)
CommentsLoading...
I wrote one very similar to this about my ten best and worst Christmas gifts of all time. You have missed a few and should check out my hub when you get the chance.
All My Best,
JT
Haha! This article made me laugh. I've received some pretty bad gifts in the past, myself. Another one would probably be "food." Unless she requests it, like you said. I think another article that could be written off this topic is "What NOT to buy a teacher for a gift." I'm not sure if you know many teachers or not, but well...ask them about it. Great Hub and voted up!
Hmmm, I've received real stinkers. I got a Coca Cola themed serving platter that was obviously a re-gift. That's probably the worst give I've ever received.
I once got a pair of crystal candlesticks etched with someone else's name and I assume anniversary date on them. I left them when I moved out.
Hey, I actually like sweet stuffed animals from my boyfriend. :-) But I agree with all the rest. I can't think of a worst gift. Guess I'm lucky with my guy....I would like to see melbel's Coke platter re-gift, though. haha! :-)
Well, I never had a high school boyfriend, so I guess I'm reliving my teen years in a way. haha. It's kind of sweet from an older guy...just sayin...!
One year my husband bought me a bathrobe - at the time I was about a size 10 and he bought me a size 2X...he had unknowingly been shopping in the plus size section and saw that the sizes were 1X, 2X and 3X, so he thought that 2X was a medium. :o)
Your article is so true and yet so funny at the same time.
Here's wishing that all women get the best gifts from now on!
To give my hubby credit, he's given me some great gifts through the years, but he hasn't always been the most perceptive person. The worst gift I ever got was an anvil - yes, an anvil- that he thought I'd like for a craft project I was doing. What's worse than a vacuum cleaner? An anvil! Great hub with lots of truth!
He is, steph, he is! :-)
That seriously made me laugh out loud Stephanie Henkel - an anvil! That's hilarious, but it does sound like he was being thoughtful. This hub of "gifts not to give women" has probably been published for merely 15 minutes; I'm not sure if anyone can top that as the worst gift ever. I'm going to watch and see. An anvil - that is just too funny!
I agree with anvil...made me laugh out loud too! :-) hehehehehe
The worst gift I ever got was none.
My friend once got a snowmobile suit from her husband in his size. He thought it was so funny.
I really wouldn't mind a vacuum, one that wouldn't kill my back.
LOL Yeah--the kitchen appliances...that would be kind of like giving one of those hose-extension rain-gutter cleaning wands or a new catch-bag for the lawn mower to a man. ;-)
You have to KNOW your gift recipient, however. I'd be yes, annoyed (unless I'd asked, as you say) with a cooking gadget...but I'd be delighted with a tool of most any kind, where as most women would look at the gift-giver as if they were nuts...because for most women, the gift of a drill or set of SAE box-end wrenches, is really for the guy....under the guise of giving her a gift. (Pssst...pass the anvil!) ;-)
As for gift cards--I think those are ok within the immmediate family group. I just gave my daughter a gift card for Peet's coffee, because I know she likes to go there to de-stress; likes their coffee; and I know she already has plenty of her fave fragrance products...AND--this is important...she is well aware of our financial situation, so "how much I spent" is a non-issue.
Voted up, useful, interesting and funny.
Oh, my Steph. . .your hub together with the funny comments gave me the laughs this morning!
My worst Christmas gift doesn't sound so bad after reading about some of the gifts our fellow hubbers have received. An anvil!!. . .unless the woman is a blacksmith and an anvil is just what she dreams to get for Christmas, I do think that could be one of the worst gifts ever!
Great hub with lots and lots of fun. Voted up and pushed all the right buttons for this one. I'll be back again for more chuckles. An anvil. . .hehehe!!
There goes my list! lol...Great advice. Voted up.
This hub made me laugh and cringe! lol
Chances are that if it's something I would like to have and it's affordable, I already have it.
Unless something will have sentimental value for some reason, like a copy of "our song," a group family photo,something special you made yourself, or something along those lines, I really don't need any more clutter around my home. I'd rather have something practical that I can actually use (food that I'm known to eat, a case of paper towels,etc.). Flowers are nice. From a family member, cash is nice and saves shipping charges on something I can buy right here where I live. No gadgets,no perfume, no jewelry,no bric-a-brac, and please,no clothing, especially sweaters.
I'll take that anvil off your hands... hee hee hee.. yeah, I'm weird... Cheers!
Excellent Steph, I now know what not to buy her- can you write one ( very quickly) on what I should. Voted up and thanks for the info.
DzyMsLizzy - You're not alone with the tools. I have requested a jigsaw and leafblower in the past, among other tools. However, if I didn't ask for those types of items I would be horrified to get them! I still think the anvil wins for worst gift so far. I'm still chuckling over that one.
This is a minefield husbands must walk three times a year...our anniversary, her birthday, and Christmas.
We are supposed to know instinctively what they want (after all, in romance novels, the tall handsome hero-jerk always knows!). I just bribe my daughter, because her mom always confides in her.
This was great information for us, especially for men like me. Actually I had never know about this. But you open my eyes about this fact. I really love all pictures and the video above. Thank you very much. Voted up!
Blessing and hugs,
The best idea is to ASK what a person might like as a gift to solve this terrible problem. I don't know if I've ever gotten a terrible gift from my husband. Even if we have no money at the time, our family members each make out a "wish list" of ideas. It really helps. Thanks for a great hub.
OMG - Your dad gave your mom a vacuum? Now that sounds like something Bob would have done early on until he got a clue~ I think the first year after we were married, he gave me a set of towels (??? - wow) and a set of cookbooks (???again was that a hint?). All I really needed was a set of cleaning products to complete the nightmare.
I do have to say after all these years, I still have most of the cookbooks. I remember telling him I'd like to stuff the towels down his throat or something similar.
The only other disaster gift he gave me for Christmas one year was a bathrobe that looked like something a hillbilly would wear. It was so NOT me that I just sat there with my mouth gaping and went "Wow - you really put some thought into this one?" Not that my mom is a hillbilly by any means, but I later regifted it to HER and she loved it! That's how FAR my husband's radar was off on that particular gift~
Great piece and very pertinent information on what women do NOT want....it is important to note that you can teach old dogs new tricks and I have to say that after 38 years or so together, Bob's selections of gifts has evolved into the perfect gift every time and without coaxing. Perhaps it was the early years of stunned silence that did it though~~~
Once someone tried to give me some very worn-out old clothing as a gift, unwrapped. I refused it. Later I learned they didn't want to walk to the trashcan and tried to give all their friends trash to take off the property. How do I meet these types of people? I'll never know.
Great read, Steph, and fabulous information. Should be a must read for all young men starting out on the rocky road of life.
The only exception I have personally encountered is the stuffed toys. My ex had a major thing about stuffed "cute" animals. Such gifts amazingly got me out of all sorts of trouble. I remember once when we lived in London forgetting to tell her that I had invited a male friend down from Scotland for a few days of "cultural sightseeing" around London's pubs. I only remembered to tell her on the morning of the day he was arriving. (I did, honestly and genuinely, forget!) She was not overly pleased and even less so when she was faced with the two of us bouncing in the door in the early hours of the morning. A small, particularly lifelike kitten after my friend had gone home repaired at least much of the damage.
Can think of a couple of people I know who might benefit from this in present times - will send it on.
Hi, Oh this was so funny! ha ha! I had a boyfriend who always bought me statue ornaments, by the time we had finished I had at least 10 mini budhas, shiva's, women with shepherd crooks and sheep, 2, yes 2 men with smoking pipes, He obviously had a poor memory, and last but not least, the only one I liked, a fairy on a horse! at least that wasn't as bad as my friend got, she recieved a picture in a plastic frame, of one of those old swimming costume complete with a man with a moustache! he couldn't understand why she didn't like it as it was a pop out one that he called 3D! Ha ha!!
My dad bought my mother some golf clubs. She cared about golf as much as she cared about kissing a cock roach. Great and practical article.
You really told the truth for us females. Voted up and awesome.
Steph, Each and every Christmas, without fail, certain relatives gave soap to my paternal grandmother. Once she mentioned it to me, as a rather sad fact, not as a complaint. She was a beautiful person who made such a difference in my life, especially after the death of my father when I was 10. I was disappointed then by such inattentive gift giving, and I was reminded with this hub of those thoughtless gifts to an amazing woman whose hygiene was always perfect. There was nothing special about the soaps.
There may be humor in laughing off thoughtless gifts for some, but for me I appreciate your tackling this topic.
Thank you.
Stessily
Great hub! I'm going to send it around the web to try to prevent an ER such as the one in the video you didn't post. My husband and I don't exchange gifts -- his family wasn't in the habit, and he wasn't great at knowing what I wanted and vice versa. We decided to get the things we wanted and needed ourselves when we wanted and needed them and spend the money on special occasions by doing something special together. It works for us.
I loved that second video with the useless gift pictures that do resemble stuff I've seen that some people actually might give someone. I cracked up over that. I agree with Seek-n-Find that someone should write a hub on what not to give a teacher. When I was teaching, the cheap colognes, soaps, etc. were pretty common gifts. The gift I liked best from a student is an ornament he made himself and I still keep even though we don't put the tree up anymore. That was forty years ago, but it reminds me of him, and he was special.
OH wow, thanks steph! lol
Stephanie's comment about the anvil cracked me up, too. I thought that the vacuum gift was bad (and it still is), but that is so much more random...
Wow, this is so funny. The worse gift I ever received was from my mother-in-law who gave me about 5 metres of fabric which I could never use because of the awful pattern. Must of been something she had in the cupboard for a few years. Hahahaha.
Gifts can be so hard and tricky to buy for people. Women can be hard to buy for. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on gift giving. I totally agree, that getting a vacuum or piece of work out equipment would be, well, not the best. It seems also, the less money you have to spend on a gift, the tougher it can be to buy something you feel good about. With a little thoughtfulness, buying a nice gift can be achieved. Voted up, also! :)
I agree an this list should be a must read for all people before they buy presents. Somehow your list made me think about that scene in "sex and the city 2" where Big gives Carry a TV as an anniversary present lol to add insult to the injury, the tv was installed in the bedroom :-(
StephHick68: What an entertaining, helpful, prescient discussion of what not to give to women! It is most enjoyable and informative the way in which you identify the problem gift, explain why it should not be given, and consider acceptable alternatives. Additionally, you always turn your hubs into such fantastically reinforcing multi-media presentations of sound and light.
Thank you for so humorously and practically sharing, voted up, etc.,
Derdriu
P.S. What is the worst gift which you ever received?
My husband and I have learned not to try and surprise each other. If we obtain no enlightenment through conversations, then at least two weeks before Christmas we flat out ask each other. This hub is full of spot on advice. Voted up, marked useful, funny and interesting
Lol. Thanks for writing this on behalf of all the Ladies.
It puts me off when I see a man buying a hoover or toaster, as a gift for his "beloved wife".
Great Hub.
Very useful hub...although I don't believe in giving and receiving gifts anymore, it is just very comercialized these days...I like to share good time with people I love and I started to give away tickets to movies, theatres, musical, concerts...or just take them on a day trip to somewhere nice...time well spent is all we all need:)
@stephhicks68 & Victoria Lynn - I think after I left the party I received that from, I left it in the trunk of my car until snow melt to try and figure out wth I was going to do with it... then over the years it disappeared. I think I gave it to my mom for her to give as an office re-gift. And, of course, I filled out a thank you card... probably something along the lines of,
"Thank you so much for the beautiful serving platter! It will definitely come in handy when I make _____!"
I received a cordless drill set from my mother-in-law one year as a Christmas gift and was delighted. It helped when I was doing a lot of my own framing of my artwork. Worst gift...a wedding gift that was a platter with ostrich skin on one side and walnut wood on the other side. Strange! Finally gave it away to charity and hopefully someone fell in love with it. Ha!
OMG this is so true and it can get you in a lot of trouble. Unfortunatly many of us have forgotten what Christmas is all about, still we expect a little more thought in a gift to show your love.
Love it! Happy Holidays to you and yours!
I cried when my boyfriend gave me a hand blender for my birthday one year. He's not my boyfriend (or husband) any more.
Everyone is different. I LIKE getting some of those things. But cheap stuff is never a good thing, unless it's from a kid who thought they found something great or pretty for you.














































ktrapp Level 7 Commenter 5 months ago
Every item on your list is very fitting for the gifts-not-to-give-women list (unless of course it is requested as you stated). And I loved what you said about knives! I am not sure of the worst gift I have received but not getting a gift at all is pretty bad.